| awwww yeahhhh |
|
|
| 09:26pm 19/07/2009 |
| |
I got a tuna sandwich, some kickin' tunes, a desk lamp, and a chilly soda at 9:30 PM--y'all KNOW what that means:
I'm gonna write the SHIT out of this story. Gonna write the goddamn SHIT out of this motherfucker |
|
| |
|
Post |
| |
| |
|
|
| 12:53am 19/04/2009 |
| |
mood:  anxious
|
I just ate two pieces of pizza I found in the fridge that had ham, pineapple, and peppers on it. It was really spicy.
I'm hoping for some groovadelic dreams tonight. |
|
| |
|
Read 1 - Post |
| |
| TODAY |
|
|
| 01:34am 17/02/2009 |
| |
Technically yesterday at this point, I guess. My mom took me to try out to be a supernumerary in Rigoletto this spring, because she wants me to like do stuff...whatever, I almost got in but I didn't make the final cut. It's kind of too bad because if ever a role was meant for me it would be that of a courtesan, but it's just as well because if I had got in my mom probably would not have shut up about "AREN'T YOU GLAD YOU CAME!?!?" Ugh I sound like such a brat and like I hate my mom or something...whatever
So then on the Bachelor he kicked off Jillian after they essentially had clothed sex in the hot tub... :( She was my favourite and actually kind of the only one I actually liked?? I guess it's just as well considering I don't even like Jason that much, maybe now she can hook up with Jesse...
Oh yeah and I watched Pokémon today because there was a marathon on Cartoon Network. It had Paul in it and now that I have seen him I think he is great...but they did these great bumpers about various presidents and the pokémon they had, it was hilarious omg...I only saw a couple, but Lincoln had a chatot and Grant had a staraptor I think.
Man I feel like I'm in a really weird spot right now, I don't know...it's like, all the things I used to really like, I don't really care about them anymore...I just feel lame and weird...I've lost interest in so many things and it's a little unnerving :/ |
|
| |
|
Post |
| |
| A week in January |
|
|
| 06:56pm 30/01/2009 |
| |
Today I took the ferry to Downtown with Valerie and Laura, and as we walked to the trolley a man said sadly to us, "That's a nice dress you have on, miss."
which was nice of him
but kind of weird since none of us was wearing a dress.
HMMMMMMM
Well, class has started now, so far so good...I got my books in the mail today and used my Barnes & Noble giftcard from Uncle Mikey to buy used copies of Peach Girl 6-8 for about $3 each (instead of say an Italian dictionary because I'm practical like that). Getting giftcards is so much better than getting checks, checks are way too much responsibility for my stunted morality but Barnes & Noble lets you use giftcards online so I don't even have to bother my dad to PayPal it for me or anything (interesting note: "giftcard" has a red misspelled line under it but "PayPal" does not). Shipping is expensive though. It was more than the actual product I was buying. ~*but it's not my money*~ |
|
| |
|
Post |
| |
| observations on a concave ego |
|
|
| 01:06am 20/01/2009 |
| |
mood:  indifferent
|
Went to the movies on Sunday and saw Twilight, it was whatever...I didn't realize how lame the storyline was...I went into Gamestop and got the last Sims 2 expansion pack in an effort to get back into The Sims 2 again, unfortunately I have a corrupt download in my game files that is causing it to crash...this (possibly) homeless man came up to us and said a poem to us at the mall to convince us to give him money. I gave him $2 even though I totally wasn't listening, I know this makes me a bad person but he would not shut up...I did my best to make engaging conversation with him for some reason, but it was difficult considering he WOULD NOT SHUT UP to let any of us talk, obviously he did not want to hold a conversation, he just wanted to talk at somebody, so whatever...man I'm a bitch
I'm trying to write a story but it's going pretty slowly. I've had a stupid past several months, so 2009 is going to have to be an improvement. I'm still trying to figure out what happened, but at some point last year I started getting really scared of everything. I was anxious and uncomfortable all the time, going to sleep made me nervous, and I just didn't feel certain about anything at all. I basically still feel like that, but now I think I understand that it comes from this complete lack of self-confidence that I have developed over my life. Last month I somehow managed to alienate myself. I should probably talk to somebody but I feel like an imposition. That goes back to my self-esteem issues, where I don't feel like I'm important to anyone. I can see where that comes from: since I have so many siblings my opinion never really mattered. Unfortunately that led to the feeling that nobody is interested in me, and well maybe that's true, it's not like I make an effort. I just don't trust myself to do anything right.
But, I don't know. I've been doing some thinking about art and I guess what I want to do with my life is just create something beautiful...I want something I do to have an impact on somebody, and make somebody feel something...or something... |
|
| |
|
Read 5 - Post |
| |
| |
|
|
| 06:47pm 13/01/2009 |
| |
mood:  apathetic
|
OK sooo now I'm going to be taking Italian at City College for the spring term. ~so that's cool~ I mean I've wanted to learn Italian for like...five years. It should be kind of easy, since I now have four years of French and a year of Spanish under my belt, not to mention I already know some bits and bobs from Italian operas. What else...Portuguese? Well, let's see, the Azores motto is...uh...something about freedom...antes morrer libre que em paz sujeito?
ah dangit I was so close
"Antes morrer livres que em paz sujeitos." Better to die free than live in subjugated peace.
so w/e we will see how that works out, maybe I will find my path in life. |
|
| |
|
Read 2 - Post |
| |
| It's been a while since I posted... |
|
|
| 03:02am 23/12/2008 |
| |
...so here's a poem.
I'm Serving Time all for a Crime I Did Commit
Take me now, baby, here as I am You're a star, steal my car, just save me Her face is cracked from smiling Fuck religion, fuck politics, fuck the lot of you
Mongoloid, he was a Mongoloid Oh as I roved out one bright summer's morn Soreness of legs, a staple mislaid I--I can't quit you, babe
I've come on a few years from my Hollywood highs Hey, you got a face like a Labrador Dearest Jane, I should have known better Remember the good times that we had
Someday I'll feel no pain Lisa's kissing men like a long walk home I want to, I want to be someone else or I'll explode Everybody's here with me
Suburban kid, ya got no name Just last night I woke from some unconscionable dream They ask me why I'm hateful, why I'm bad Got me some down in Chinatown |
|
| |
|
Read 7 - Post |
| |
| |
|
|
| 05:06pm 13/12/2008 |
| |
I keep getting mail from OKCupid, even though I wasn't aware I signed up...I just wanted to take a quiz...
I can't tell if they are form letters because they call me things like "you quirky thing"...it kind of scares me...
I just like personality quizzes :( |
|
| |
|
Read 2 - Post |
| |
| |
|
|
| 07:17pm 10/12/2008 |
| |
 |
|
| |
|
Post |
| |
| |
|
|
| 01:08am 06/12/2008 |
| |
Today there was a lot of poop in my toilet, which is wtf because that toilet is supposed to flush like forty golf balls or something.
I wrote a poem about it...
Beat on the brat You are raining in Is a mháithrín an ligfidh tú chun aonaigh mé Drink up baby
There was a fair maid Lord I don't know when to start After all
I want to live A playful little kitten Someone lights a cigarette Thy will be done
Breaking rocks in the hot sun So you're on the floor The queen of light took her bow I am a maid that sleeps in love
We should have talked about this All men have secrets I am hot Banned from the Roxy
I like writing poems in this manner because it highlights my disjointed taste in music. |
|
| |
|
Read 1 - Post |
| |
| |
|
|
| 10:57pm 01/12/2008 |
| |
First things first:
Your rainbow is shaded violet. What is says about you: You are a creative person. You appreciate beauty and craftsmanship. You are patient and will keep trying to understand something until you've mastered it. Find the colors of your rainbow at spacefem.com.
Put your MP3 player on shuffle, and write down the first line of the first twenty songs. Post the poem that results. The first line of the twenty-first is the title. (I'm going to start doing this all the time, I can tell)
Ooh Stop
Colour me your colour, baby The problem of leisure Once I was a soldier A moment in time, rosin the bow
After that confrontation Did I forget that I said to you that I'd be there I didn't see the Statue of Liberty There's never room for coughing in the photo album
I've been told when a boy kiss a girl Some people might say my life is in a rut One day I woke up in my bed Such a drag to want something sometime
My body is a cage When I come around, I see you in the light Haïti, mon pays, wounded mother I'll never see I'm as troubled a young man, my friend, as you ever did see
I can't go to work It's rough Swung from a chandelier All around my hat I will wear the green willow |
|
| |
|
Post |
| |
| |
|
|
| 10:41pm 29/11/2008 |
| |
I just got back from San Francisco...AND BOY DO MY LEGS HURT
For those not in the know that was a corruption of the ancient joke "I just flew here from (wherever) and boy do my arms hurt!"
I didn't understand that joke until I was like...thirteen but anyway.
On Thanksgiving I drove up there with my dad to visit my sister Danica and her roommate Peter. I was mostly still asleep (even though it was about noon) and we first stopped at the McDonald's drive through and my dad asked me if I wanted anything...I just got a Coke...and as soon as we left the McDonald's I was like...damn I'm hungry. I eventually got a sandwich at a gas station mart thing. We stopped there in the afternoon to go to the bathroom, for which the line was extremely long. I waited in line (I had to pee really bad) and my dad bought me a sandwich that said "Health Nut Turkey" on the box. It was okay. I thought it was a little dehydrated until I ate half of it and realized there was a little mini mayonnaise thing in the bottom of the box, but I was too lazy to open it...
Eventually we got to our destination and Danica told us to meet her at a Korean restaurant called Playground. We went and sat down there and my hands at this point smelled like an unholy combination of five or six different gas station bathroom soaps. Surprisingly enough, the restaurant was inhabited largely by Korean people. There were four televisions set up throughout the room, some playing the news, or a basketball game, or K-pop music videos, but the restaurant soundtrack seemed to come from none of these. Danica told us about a Japanese B-movie called "Wild Zero" in which the final line is "ROCK AND ROLL!!!" but it sounds more like "LOCK EN LORU!"
SO we then went to Danica's and Peter's apartment and went to bed, walking up four flights of stairs on the way because she informed us that the elevator was broken. We didn't see Peter because he was at his parents' (or possibly cousins') house for Thanksgiving. The next morning Danica went to work and Daddy and I set off on a mission: to buy furniture for them. They wanted a bookshelf, desk, or loft bed, in black. We went to Ikea and they were having some sort of promotion where you could get a free "small breakfast", which consisted of scrambled eggs, potatoes, and bacon. So we got some breakfasts and sat down with a man who introduced himself as Stat and he and my father talked about the military for a very long time. Like Ikea furniture, the food was sort of nondescript and liberated of any fripperies such as flavour, resulting in a meal that looked and tasted exactly like its generic menu photograph.
We found the perfect bookshelf/desk combo, but they were out of it, so we went to another Ikea in Palo Alto and found it there. We came back to the apartment and took the first box upstairs. As we took the second one inside, we saw two men using the elevator. We sure thought that was funny. We spent the afternoon constructing the shelf and desk, and when Danica came back we rearranged furniture. We walked to Japantown that night and looked in store windows because they were mostly closed for some reason, and eventually Peter came and met us at Benihana. Peter's 22nd birthday was a few days before, so my dad conspired with the staff to surprise him with a Japanese birthday song. The staff were all Asian but were named things like Jonathan and Alfredo.
We ate some food and my dad, Danica, and Peter drank a collective five bottles of sake. After a while the waitress ambushed Peter with a candle to blow out and the Japanese version of "If You're Happy and You Know It", which merged into English "Happy Birthday" at the end, after which my father screamed, "LOCK EN LORU!" (he had been playing the tambourine)
Good thing nobody knows me in San Francisco
We walked back to the apartment where Danica threw up a few times, my dad fell asleep, and I awkwardly watched Speed Racer cartoons while Peter and his boyfriend Jared took a very long shower. Danica went to bed miserably but Peter and I did not fall asleep for a while because my father snores like...a fifty-year-old man. We whispered pleasantries in the dark such as "We should poke him with a stick or something" and "We should roll him over" "Will that stop it?" "...I don't know"
Danica went to work again the next morning, and my dad and I said goodbye to Peter and then went back to the Japantown mall to go into the stores that had been closed. I went in the manga section of a bookstore and looked for Peach Girl, because I only have the first five volumes, but they didn't have it. :( They only had the spin-offs. BUT I did find Cromartie High School, which I have wanted to read for a while but I could never find it.
Then we drove for another ten hours back to San Diego. It was pretty boring and made me dizzy. |
|
| |
|
Read 5 - Post |
| |
| Dancing with the Stars |
|
|
| 12:53am 22/11/2008 |
| |
This is one of my favourite routines...even though their sailor-themed jitterbug from later in the show scored a point more, it was their mambo I couldn't stop thinking about...it's so clever and their timing was spot-on. I just thought Lacey's choreography was so sexy and sophisticated, and her peacock dress(?) was cute too. They're my favourite couple this season. They always seem to have fun. The judge favourite is Brooke Burke and Derek Hough. Brooke is a good dancer, so I wouldn't mind if she won, but I'd rather that Lance won because I like his partner better. :P Plus Brooke had some ugly-ass outfits this week. You get a little look at her salsa outfit in this clip, which is some kind of Native American genie flesh-tone pants monstrosity, and her jive outfit was no better...didn't get it at all
Anyway
I'm pretty sure this is the best thing on TV...it's the only thing I currently watch with any regularity, excluding Arthur. I love Dancing with the Stars because it has no illusions about how ridiculous it is...it's a completely frivolous show, but it doesn't pretend to be anything else. Plus, Tom Bergeron hosts, and you can always count on him to throw in some witty bons mots to make up for Samantha Harris' awkward/painful co-hosting. Results night usually has some kind of genuinely funny filter segment, like "DanceCenter" with Kenny Mayne, or the "Dance Along at Home" of previous seasons with Jimmy Kimmel and his parking lot attendant Guillermo.
So it's a great show but I'm still not sure what prompted me to write about it at one in the morning... |
|
| |
|
Post |
| |
| Dreams |
|
|
| 01:05am 15/11/2008 |
| |
Last night I had a dream where I was on some kind of reality show. I don't know exactly what it was about, but on the first night there was a party for all the people on it. I was hanging out with Brock (of Pokémon fame) and Adrian Edmondson (who was in costume as Vyvyan). I held out my arms to them and said, "Let me buy you something to drink!" I guess this was a joke because the drinks were free. So we walked up to the bar arm-in-arm and for whatever reason we couldn't get drinks...either they had run out or had to stop giving them out for some reason. So I just started laughing my ass off, for no reason.
If my life turns out to be like that dream I would be pretty darn pleased... |
|
| |
|
Post |
| |
| To-Do List |
|
|
| 11:55pm 09/11/2008 |
| |
mood:  nervous
|
Well there's a phrase I never thought I'd type.
TOMORROW I must -go to the library for a terrible romance novel -deposit a 2-month old check (do checks go bad? I hate checks) -ship my ms??
I've had this manuscript printed out for a month but have been too chicken to send it... :( I need to get over myself and understand that the sooner the better, for all parties involved...
But what I'm most nervous about is the actual sending of it...what do I even do?? Go to the UPS Store...and...then what. I also don't know how to deposit or cash a check, even though I think I've done it before...God I hate checks so much, I don't know why people can't just buy me a g-darn object instead of writing me a check...I hate money |
|
| |
|
Post |
| |
| Design Toscano: A New Low |
|
|
| 10:21pm 07/11/2008 |
| |
mood:  distressed
|
Design Toscano is PURE MOTHAFUCKIN CLASS.
Case in point:
Socrates, the Gargoyle Thinker Statue Is he pondering life’s mysteries—or his next victim?
 "At nearly two feet tall, this muscular gargoyle is a menacing presence flanking a garden path or a stately fireplace. From his horned head to his spiked fangs and powerful wings, Socrates perches upon his pedestal, pondering the big picture. Cast in quality designer resin, our Toscano exclusive features a two-tone finish that captures every exquisite sculptural detail." [answer: he is pondering what colour to paint his toenails]
Hercules and Diomedes Statue (1550) Bonded Natural Marble Sculpture Scaled replica of the original by Vincenzo de’ Rossi (1525-1587), Florence
 "A Renaissance image celebrating the strength and beauty of the human form, this museum-quality sculpture depicts one of the twelve mythic labors of Hercules. The artist, a student of Michelangelo, was commissioned to sculpt the myth in which Hercules throws Diomedes to his own man-eating mares. Cast in bonded natural marble, each detail is finished with care." Buy two or more Draped or Nude Hercules and Diomedes Sculptures - only $39.95 each! [okay, yes, this is a replica, but why would you need TWO $40 statues of Hercules getting a handjob??] [original price is $49.95 btw]
( But even I was not prepared for this... )
D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: |
|
| |
|
Read 1 - Post |
| |
| Uhhhh |
|
|
| 06:26pm 16/10/2008 |
| |
When I turn on my computer and log in, my computer welcomes me and then hits me up with this:
The Windows VistaTM Home Basic product key you typed is invalid for activation.
Um, what? The only thing I typed was my password crazy bitch
My choices are:
Access your computer with reduced functionality This will also allow you to buy a product key online Oh really how convenient
Type a different product key Hmm maybe if I knew what the first one was which I must have typed in I don't know A YEAR AND A HALF AGO when my computer was new
Contact Hewlett-Packard Company to help resolve this problem This is probably what my dad will make me do and I hate talking to support people ok
Or of course Cancel
At the bottom of my screen it says,
Windows Vista (TM) Build 6000 This copy of Windows is not genuine
Wow way to make me shit my pants
"Reduced functionality" means I can only access the internet. Weird? Cancel just takes me to the log-in screen. w/e
Yeah anyway this computer is almost two years old, so why all this all of a sudden? I Googled this like a good girl but I still don't know what to do...I don't know what this means but it's pretty frigging terrifying |
|
| |
|
Post |
| |
| Dreams |
|
|
| 01:29pm 10/10/2008 |
| |
I had this dream where I was eating various small pieces of metal (things like safety pins, earring backs, etc.). I don't know why I was doing this, I may have been trying to get vitamins and minerals from them, but they were weirdly easy to eat and very crunchy. I was eating some earring backs, but then I realized they were the kinds that have those plastic guards on them, so I went to the trash can to spit them out.
I woke up to find myself spitting into my hair. THANKS |
|
| |
|
Read 1 - Post |
| |
|
|
|